Friday, February 03, 2006

Best Headlines from 2005

This was sent to me in an email forward. I'm not sure if these are actual headlines from newspapers across the country in 2005, but if they are....they are hilarious! If not, they are still funny. I added some personal insights...

Best Headlines From 2005:

Crack Found on Governer's Daughter


Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says


Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Seems a bit extreme to me.

Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?

Too easy. I'm not commenting on this one.

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

Now, that is work dedication.

Miners Refuse to Work after Death

Lazy bastards!

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

Well, if all else fails...

War Dims Hope for Peace

Isn't that the whole point?

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile.


Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

Really? That's as lame as water leads to wet.

Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

That seems like a stretch to me.

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

Doesn't seem very safe to me.

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge

Puns are nobody's friend.

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

At least he's man enough to own up to his bodily functions.

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

I wonder what the penalty for skipping class is?

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Those are some tall doctors.

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

I bet they're all dead.


Pizzle said...

I'd be interested to know if those are truly real...

Shanshu said...

Yeah, me too. But I also don't want take the time to look them all up.

If anybody wants to do that, I'll update the post!!


musie said...

yeah..i dont know if those are real but they sure made me twitter and a pitter, too funny, esp since you said exactly what i was thinking! get out of my head please! i only have space for that small gnome and hes a bit of a whiner.

Spinning Girl said...

Now that's good, solid fun.

Jen said...

It sounds like something that would be real.

Think Frustrated said...

It's like something you see on Leno, when he does those little headline things.