Shanshu's Christmas List

• $1,000,000 in un-marked, non-sequential bills
• Group bunny with somebody famous or semi-famous or at least somebody who has done some TV commercials
• 1986 Pontiac Fiero (red)
• An iPod Nano
• A Nintendo Gamecube so I can purchase the new Legend of Zelda game
• An entire case of wine/mead
• Naked pictures of my 4th grade English teacher, Mrs. Kennedy
• A katana sword
• A time-travel device that also makes ice cream
• 2 all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun
• A date with a blogger gal
• A law, signed by myself and the President of the United states, which will make Reality TV illegal and punishable by death
• The Boondock Saints sequel
• My very own laptop
• One word: Oakley's
• A new tattoo that makes me look both sexy, and sophisticated
• A package of Oreo cookies and a glass of milk
• A leather-bound copy of Maxim
• A box of Puffs Plus with aloe
• A battery for my broken silver watch
• Charisma Carpenter's home phone number
• 17 rubber bands
• The ability to stop the beating of a frog's heart using only the power of my mind
• One of the original 20 great Rings of Power
• Ankle-high socks with navy blue trim
• One bottle of ice-cold root beer
• A Pink Lady golf ball
• A house with a big yard and a finished basement
• Peace on earth, and goodwill towards men
• The original Optimus Prime Transformers toy
• A pair of twin golden Beretta guns with holsters
• Spidey-Sense
• A tea cozy
• A hole in my bedroom wall that lets me see into the fabric of time and space
• A puppy that doesn't move unless I pet it
• A knife that cuts bread and toasts it, at the same time
• A weekly magazine that keeps me up to date on world news, politics, and entertainment
• Oral sex from Jenna Jameson
• Pencils