I did some pretty dumb things when I was a kid, and I'm sure I've done plenty of not-very-smart things during my college years and drunk adventures.
However, I am totally blown away by the amount of balls it would take to do this:
super fun happy slide
Holy effing shit.
Showing posts with label Crazy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Crazy. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Thursday, February 22, 2007
The Universe Thinks We Are Crazy
The universe is laughing at us.
Why? Because we are stupid. We are stupid, insecure, frightened monkeys with too much free time and not enough outlets for sexual tension and aggressive behavior. We constantly find new ways to torture ourselves because we are bored, and we come up with different ways to torture each other on a daily basis. Our favorite way to make life difficult for one another is the law.
We love to manipulate the law to our own liking. Anything that can remotely offend a person is illegal…or it’s going to be illegal…or it’s on its way to being illegal right now.
In fact, saying the word “obberpunkz” is probably illegal. I bet the police are coming to get me right now, so I’d better type fast.
Things have gotten so bad in this country in regards to laws and rules and litigious behavior, that people are afraid to take any action in any situation, for fear of doing something wrong. Why should I help that old lady cross the street? She might charge me with assault or something. See that burning building? There’s people inside burning to death. We should call the fire department and not do anything else to help because we might be charged with “invading a scene of danger” or criminal trespassing.
I joke. You laugh…but I’m not too far off the mark.
There are so many rules and so many different ways to manipulate a given situation, that is almost impossible to know with any degree of certainty what is acceptable, and what is not. If you had asked me yesterday if throwing a cup of ice (a paper cup, mind you) at a person would land me in jail for 2 years…I would tell you to go fuck yourself. There is no way that would happen.
How wrong I was.
Woman Sentanced to Two Years For Ice "Missle"
How can a person be sentenced to 2 years in a federal prison for tossing a cup of ice into somebody else’s car? That is a kind of crazy I didn’t know was possible in this world. It sounds like something out of a Nazi training manual.
“Nein! You vill not throw ze ice cup anymore! 2 years in ze prison camp. Schnell!”
Still don't see the crazy? So tell me this. When did this country become so afraid of its own shadow, that doing something such as attempting to help a rape victim is grounds for prison time?
Man Arrested After Mistaking Porn for Rape
Our laws have lost all common sense, and have become out of control.
Did you know, that if a man breaks into your house and tries to stab your children while they sleep…and you catch him in the act and break his arm…he can sue you? Did you also know that he actually has a good chance of winning said lawsuit? Is that justice? I call it insanity on an epic scale. When I hear stuff like that, I try to wake up from the nightmare that is called “real life” because it sucks.
Why? Because we are stupid. We are stupid, insecure, frightened monkeys with too much free time and not enough outlets for sexual tension and aggressive behavior. We constantly find new ways to torture ourselves because we are bored, and we come up with different ways to torture each other on a daily basis. Our favorite way to make life difficult for one another is the law.
We love to manipulate the law to our own liking. Anything that can remotely offend a person is illegal…or it’s going to be illegal…or it’s on its way to being illegal right now.
In fact, saying the word “obberpunkz” is probably illegal. I bet the police are coming to get me right now, so I’d better type fast.
Things have gotten so bad in this country in regards to laws and rules and litigious behavior, that people are afraid to take any action in any situation, for fear of doing something wrong. Why should I help that old lady cross the street? She might charge me with assault or something. See that burning building? There’s people inside burning to death. We should call the fire department and not do anything else to help because we might be charged with “invading a scene of danger” or criminal trespassing.
I joke. You laugh…but I’m not too far off the mark.
There are so many rules and so many different ways to manipulate a given situation, that is almost impossible to know with any degree of certainty what is acceptable, and what is not. If you had asked me yesterday if throwing a cup of ice (a paper cup, mind you) at a person would land me in jail for 2 years…I would tell you to go fuck yourself. There is no way that would happen.
How wrong I was.
Woman Sentanced to Two Years For Ice "Missle"
How can a person be sentenced to 2 years in a federal prison for tossing a cup of ice into somebody else’s car? That is a kind of crazy I didn’t know was possible in this world. It sounds like something out of a Nazi training manual.
“Nein! You vill not throw ze ice cup anymore! 2 years in ze prison camp. Schnell!”
Still don't see the crazy? So tell me this. When did this country become so afraid of its own shadow, that doing something such as attempting to help a rape victim is grounds for prison time?
Man Arrested After Mistaking Porn for Rape
Our laws have lost all common sense, and have become out of control.
Did you know, that if a man breaks into your house and tries to stab your children while they sleep…and you catch him in the act and break his arm…he can sue you? Did you also know that he actually has a good chance of winning said lawsuit? Is that justice? I call it insanity on an epic scale. When I hear stuff like that, I try to wake up from the nightmare that is called “real life” because it sucks.
God, the universe, and everything are looking at us and saying, “What a bunch of fucking retards down there. Seriously, check this out. Hey, Pluto! Quit pouting about that plant demotion crap, and get over here! Look at what these morons are doing now! Bring a camera.”
We have got to be the laughing stock of the cosmos, and deservedly so.
Use your common sense. Follow your heart. See the world for the crazy that it is.
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